Why Normal Has To Die A long bus ride home I don’t do normal well. I never have. As a kid I always had this sense that I was just different from other kids, not just because I was bigger or more vocal. There was something else. I thought differently. I saw things differently.…
Are you experiencing burnout and not sure what to do? Burnout is so much more than just being tired. Burnout is the result of your brain and body trying desperately to cope with a long term energy deficit. Simply put, your gas tank is empty and you are running on fumes. Burnout is…
Take one of these steps today! It is an urban myth that improving your mental health takes a long time. In fact, great gains can be made fairly quickly if we take the right steps. Today we are going to explore some of the most effective strategies for reducing stress and decreasing your risk…
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs: Explained A common issue that leads people to seek therapy is lack of motivation, but what I usually find is that lack of motivation is not the only issue, but something underlying that is getting in the way. Let’s explore! Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs is a theory surrounding motivation. It explains…
“It’s not me, it’s you!“ Last week I was invited to do an interview to discuss my thoughts on Pinterest’s recent decision to ban weight-loss advertisements across its entire platform. Having some thoughts on the matter, I agreed to the interview knowing the host always enjoyed a lively discussion and made room for multiple…
What is a Woman anyways? You just aren’t very domestic. As these words rolled off my mother’s tongue, I instantly felt a sudden rush of shame, followed by an equally intense rising tide of rage. “No, I’m not. But you aren’t very educated, are you?”. I instantly regretted my words, but not completely. If…
Passion & Poison: How Outrage is Destroying Your Mental Health Protests, riots & scandals, OH MY! You do not have to look very far to find something to be upset about. Lately, it seems that everywhere you look, you can see two opposing sides locked in a never-ending battle to prove what is right and…
Toxic Masculinity – BSCP Men’s Mental Health Week The term “toxic masculinity” is used widely these days, but what does this relatively new term even mean? Who decided what masculinity is and what toxic masculinity is? What problems can these definitions cause in society? As we enter men’s mental health week at B. Skinner Coaching…
Marriage on the rocks? You’re not alone. Marriage is not for the faint of heart. In Canada, 38% of marriages end in divorce with countless others in separation. In 2020, 2.7 million married couples called it quits, resulting in twice as many divorces than in year 2000. With this trend showing no signs of slowing…
So, You Think Your Ex Is A Narcissist? “Okay, I did some research and I feel so much better! I know why my ex and I didn’t last, and IT WASN’T MY FAULT AT ALL!” “Oh”, I responded curious as to the details behind the sudden epiphany. “Tell me more.” While I was…
“Must be nice!” – The Bait & Switch of Working from Home When you think of working from home, you might conjure up images of sitting on a comfy couch in your favorite PJs, laptop on your lap, and a hot coffee by your side. Or perhaps you imagine taking calls through your headset…
Do Your Beliefs Need An Upgrade? What lessons do you remember from your childhood? As children, we receive hundreds of messages each and every day. These messages can be about our safety (“Don’t touch the hot stove.”), our relationships (“We don’t push our friends.”), or even about how we should behave in the world (“No…
Here is your instant antidote for misery! For starters… I refuse to mention the L**kdown #3 or C***D-19! If you are anything like me, you have had enough of the 24hr pandemic news reel. For that reason, I thought this might be a great opportunity to fill your inboxes with something a little lighter and…
The Thing About Change – How To Do Better “Nothing changes, if nothing changes.” – Unknown Therapy can be a very cathartic experience. Taking the time for intentional guided self-reflection can lead to life changing perspectives on the way we see ourselves, our relationships, and our lives. That said, the magic of creating change…
How To Get Your Motivation Back! Have you ever had a day when you felt being productive would require nothing short of divine intervention? We all know what it feels like to wake up, ready to go only to realize our motivation has decided to take a sick day (without even giving notice!). In…
You are being BULLIED! Here’s how to STOP IT! “Oh my God, Bonnie, you are such an idiot!” That’s how my Easter Morning began. Now before you start wondering about the nature of my relationships, I must let you know that the voice throwing out that sharp critique was none other than my own!…
Why you can’t just LET IT GO! Have you ever been haunted by something in your past? A nagging memory of embarrassment or shame that you just can’t shake? Have you every shared such a memory with a close or trusted friend only to hear the famed cliché “You just need to let it…
The Death of Dreams & How to Restore Hope What happens to our dreams when we become adults? As children, our dreams are the gateway to possibility. Ask a preschooler to make a wish and it won’t take them long to provide an awe-inspiring list of mystical adventures, superheroes, ponies, and castles complete with…
What a Meltdown Over Cake Taught Me About Alone Time What do you do that is just for you? I have a slightly embarrassing real-life story I want to share. It is dedicated to anyone who has suddenly found themselves at their wits end in the strangest of circumstances! When Covid stretched from a…
Are Your Friendships A Fit? Are you holding on to a friendship that no longer fits? Many of us are. Our growth and development as individuals can often change what we need from our friendships. When we are young and energetic, we are more likely to surround ourselves with friends who are outgoing, excitable, and…
The Worst Clichés For Your Mental Health In the land where quotes and memes litter the highways of social media, it can be hard to find meaningful advice and guidance. While I have always had an affinity for things that can make life simpler, I am developing a growing irritation with clichés that just…
This is where you quit! Today is February 1st. It has been 1 month since millions of people around the world started anew. They set their intentions, wrote down their goals, and promised themselves “2021 is going to be My Year!”. For many of those same people… today marks a crucial fork in the road.…
Choosing Your Mental Health We are 10 days into 2021 and there is no shortage of challenges to your mental health. COVID rages and many are facing yet another lockdown. While the vaccine has brought hope to many, it has come too late for those who have faced devastating losses of their livelihood, their sense…
How Do I Know If My Child Is Anxious? Like adults, children can struggle with anxiety. Unlike adults, children don’t always have the knowledge or ability to understand or describe their experience of anxiety. Often a child’s anxiety can be identified best by changed in their day to day presentation and behaviours. . Here…
Am I Making My Partner’s Anxiety Worse? Taking care of each other is a hallmark of a healthy relationship and can go a long way towards helping both partners feel secure and safe. But when it comes to providing care to a partner struggling with anxiety, we have to make sure our care doesn’t become…
What Should I Expect When I Go To Therapy? Taking the steps to seek support can be very scary and takes a lot of strength, and not knowing what to expect can trigger fear and anxiety. Healing can be ‘messy’ and it takes time, but it is worth the effort. Not all therapy looks the…
Anxiety & Depression: Is There A Quick Fix? When we start to see new clients that are struggling with anxiety and depression, they often hope to find some type of immediate relief for the symptoms they are feeling. Although the therapeutic process does take some time, there are some things we can recommend. One of…
What Does Anxiety & Depression Really Feel Like? Anxiety and depression can feel very different and have unique characteristics for each person who is experiencing it. Many people who are experiencing anxiety and depression are not even aware. I have had many clients even attend the ER thinking there was something physically wrong with them,…
What Someone With Anxiety & Depression Wants You To Know It can be really hard to be a friend or family member of someone who is struggling with anxiety & depression, but these tips located below can truly make a huge difference to the person struggling. The first thing someone with anxiety & depression…
What Is Wrong With Me?! One of the most common questions my clients ask me is, “What is wrong with me?”. The quickest answer to that is…….. NOTHING. As human beings, when we experience trauma, abuse, or difficult life circumstances, our brains work to help protect us from the negative feelings that have resulted…
Crushing Imposter Syndrome: How To Sit With Giants You’ve levelled up—maybe a promotion, a business milestone, and are setting out on an awesome but scary new adventure. You are surrounded by those who have ascended before you and are achieving the things that inspire you. All of a sudden, a voice inside you says….. “You…
3 Obstacles to Your Happily Ever After Relationships are not easy. Few things inspire like a Hollywood romance; the uncertain fate of destined lovers battling relentlessly against some goliath-sized obstacle until finally they overcome and live happily ever after. The movie ends, the lights come on, and you sit there wondering, “Why can’t I have…
Before The Breakdown: Why Our Mental Health (& Our Cars) Are Suffering! Last week during an interview I was asked, “Why are so many people struggling with issues of mental health?”. It was a great question that, despite the complexity of the issue, I tried to answer as simply as I could. “Because we treat…
The ‘Selfishness’ of Suicide – A hard look at the final decision of a loved one. The decision of a loved one to end their own life can be as hard to understand as it is to accept. The stigma around mental health and suicide has labeled the act of suicide as selfish, thoughtless, and…
Tips To Boost Your Self Esteem Something I see often in my practice and with those around me in my personal life is a tendency to be very hard on ourselves. We often set very unrealistic expectations for ourselves and think about ourselves negatively. So many people not only lack self-esteem, but even view…
The 4 Styles Of Communication Healthy relationships are not easy, they take work. Many couples have been struggling more lately because of COVID. Couples are spending a lot more time together; they have fewer social and physical outlets available to them; they are managing work and home life in a new way; there are…
7 Tips For Stressed-Out Parents Day in & day out, you both wake up with your own eternally growing to-do list. You start your morning routine; feeding & dressing the tiny humans, brushing your teeth, brushing their teeth, driving the tiny monsters.. oops, I mean humans to school, and then drive yourself to work.…
5 Ways You Are Sabotaging Your Mental Health Right Now! Things are not going well, and you feel it. Getting out of bed feels like a daily punishment. Every task feels monumental, every interaction excruciating. And for some reason someone yelling “MOMMMMM” from across the room makes you want to scream and cry at the…
Chris Cooper is NOT My Daddy (& Greg Glassman Isn’t Yours) – Understanding Transference in Leadership & Business I got dumped. Dad went to play with the big kids and left me here alone. That’s not what happened. But that’s how it felt. Chris Cooper left me and I was all alone in the world.…
Forgotten Fathers: Providing Support for Post-Partum Dads The transition into parenthood can be both thrilling and terrifying for new parents. Through the decades, we have made great strides in maternal mental health, prioritizing and providing resources to help expectant mothers care for themselves and their child. From the very beginning the mother’s physical and mental…
Taught to be “Tough“: The Importance of De-Stigmatizing Men’s Mental Health Mental health is a topic that carries a stigma regardless of who we are, but the stigma associated with men’s mental health is more prevalent and is compounded by social and cultural pressures. We have a history of ignoring men’s mental health and teaching…
How to Talk About Racism “I am not racist.” If it is not stated overtly, then it can be insinuated in the actions of those who squirm uncomfortably when topic of race arises. The fear of being called racist or seen as upholding racist ideas often causes many to avoid or shut down conversations about…
Black. Privileged. Silent. How The Death of George Floyd Can Make Space for Our Stories. George Floyd was murdered a week ago. I don’t even know what day it was really – the days have all run together. I just know that since that day the newsreel has provided 24 hour coverage of the protests,…
The Truth About Therapy – 10 Common Myths Debunked As a psychotherapist, there are very few myths about therapy that I haven’t heard. Today I have decided to set the record straight on a few of my favorites! If I have missed any , feel free to visit our facebook page and post them. I…
Thinking About Therapy? The Beginners Guide – Part 2 In ‘Thinking About Therapy? Part 1’, we explored important factors to consider when choosing a therapist. In Part 2, we will cover everything you need to know about the process of therapy from booking your first appointment to your last session. Booking Your First Appointment In…
Thinking About Therapy? The Beginners Guide to Seeking Professional Support The decision to seek professional support isn’t always an easy one. Whether you are a therapy first-timer or re-starting with someone new, not knowing what to expect can trigger fear and anxiety. This discomfort and fear of the unknown can lead to procrastination and make…
“Just Love Yourself“ – Why We Need to Stop Throwing Clichés at Depressed People If loving yourself was easy, everyone would. If I told you to love the next stranger you meet, could you? What if I told you that doing so would improve everything in your life and help you find the joy you…
Parenting An Anxious Child Being a parent isn’t easy on the best of days and parenting a child who is anxious can be an even more complex and challenging journey. As parents, our natural instinct is to protect and comfort our children when they are in distress; we want to help them. Anxiety is a…
The Myth of Motivation & How to Actually Get S#%T Done ! Lacking a little motivation ? After the initial panic of the COVID-19 pandemic settled and we started to establish the interim norms of finding new routines for work, home, and family, optimism started to shine on the opportunity to play catch up with…
No BAD Kids: A Guide to Understanding a Child’s Behaviour There are no bad kids; just troubled ones. While this statement might seem debatable if you have ever struggled with a child’s undesirable behaviours , children at every stage communicate through their behaviour. A hungry baby cries, a happy toddler smiles, and an angry teenager…
Trauma & COVID-19 – Our Collective Road To Recovery “When the pandemic started, I was in total panic. I was scared but I just focused on what I had to do. Now I don’t know how I feel and all I can think is … ‘Now what’.” This was a statement from a client I…
Staying Connect to the Elderly During COVID-19 For many families, intergenerational relationships are a very important part of everyday life. The new realities of social distancing have resulted in a number of new issues and concerns for families with older adults, whether they will be living in our homes, in their own homes, in long…
COVID-19 & The Entrepreneur – How to Move Forward COVID-19 has felt like an emotional roller coaster for small businesses and entrepreneurs with few highs. The demands on our psychological, emotional and financial resources have changed drastically in a matter of weeks. We are worried about our families. Our livelihood. Our communities. Our world. It…
Corona Virus Mayhem – Why are People Acting So Crazy?!?!?! As I walked through the local Walmart this afternoon and bore witness to the empty shelves that are typically stocked with essential items such as bread, meat, soap and toilet paper, I thought about all of the social posts and memes I’ve read over the…
5 Best Brain Hacks To Combat Overwhelm So, you have a super long list of to-dos and no matter how much you do the list keeps growing. There aren’t enough hours in the day because they’ve all magically migrated to nighttime where you lie awake for hours too tired to be productive but, too stressed…
Pulling into any mall parking lot will confirm that the Christmas season is in full effect. Aside from the holiday sales and commercial rhetoric, the air is filled with the buzz of excitement and angst as we finalize plans for holiday gatherings and traditions. While the holidays can often be a boost to the spirit,…
Caught In the Middle – Supporting Your Child Through Divorce Separation and divorce can be a difficult transition for children of all ages. Changes in routine, family structure, living arrangements, and overall family dynamics can leave children feeling afraid, confused, sad, angry, and wondering if they are to blame. Here are the 3 keys to…
Self Care and How It Can Help! When clients come in to my office, struggling with anxiety, depression, or any of life’s complexities, I have many questions I ask to gain a better understanding of their woes. Of course I want to know about the problem; when did it start? How has it impacted their…
It is hard to watch a loved one in pain. It often creates a feeling of helplessness that can drive us into a desperate search for the best advice or guidance we can offer. In some cases not knowing how to help can result in our well intentioned attempts pushing our loved ones further away.…
It’s 9am. You’ve hit the snooze button for the 12th time since 6am. You’re already late. You sent a text to your supervisor to tell her you are sick and can’t come in today. “I’ll get a doctor’s note,” you tell yourself with a slight pang of guilt, and you lay back down. That was…
